Hopefully, I’ll be somewhere in Oregon, teaching English. I hope to have my phd by then, and maybe even in ten years I’ll be a college professor. I hope to be married and have children. And a really quaint little house, with a few English bulldogs, a hairless cat, and a bunch of rats. But honestly, in ten years all I want is to be happy. I suppose I could care less if I’m married and have kids, and pets. I just want to be happy with my life in ten years, no matter where I end up.
I have a boyfriend, and his name is Nick. We have our problems like everyone else, but I think that for the most part, we get along well. I really do love him very much, and I hope that after two years, he feels the same for me. :)
I don’t even know where to start with this girl. There is something seriously wrong with her head, and it makes me sad because I KNOW that there are more people out there who think like her.
BEING THIN DOES NOT EQUATE HAPPINESS.
BEING PRETTY DOES NOT EQUATE HAPPINESS.
I don’t think that I’m much of either, but superficial things like weight and how my face looks don’t make me happy. Being content with my life and friends and loved ones is what makes me happy. Things like listening to music and working on my novel and drinking Earl Grey tea make me happy. I couldn’t give two shits about what you look like, or what clothes you wear. I care about what’s inside a person, what they think, feel and act. I really like to think that most of the world agrees with me, and shallow things like being fat or skinny, pretty or ugly doesn’t matter. Because in reality, those things will fade and change over time. But who you are as a person won’t, and that’s what I care about.
I look like those girls that people post pictures of with the caption “ew, would she really rather starve then just eat a bag of fucking potato chips?” or “ew, she’s like, nasty. why can’t she just have some curves.”
I do not starve myself. I do not eat less than you do intentionally.
I am just skinny.
It’s called a metabolism.
Deal with it.
Exactly. And then people get on my case because I can’t eat a whole lot and get full really fast. I literally can’t finish most meals. Fuck you, I eat when I’m hungry.
I got my wisdom teeth taken out today, and I feel pretty decent now, but I’m probably going to feel like shit tomorrow. Oh well. hopefully they schedule me a lot next week since I’ll be done with school, because I REALLY need to money. I’m so broke right now, and basically all my money is going to Nick to pay for a Hawaiian cruise in February. Which I’m so excited about, its just insanely expensive, something like, $2,000. And I’ve given him like, $800 so far. I’m getting there, but hopefully since I’ll be done with school, I can work a lot more. I was hoping to be starting server training next week but I guess not because the service manager wants me to be a host for longer. He’s not starting any training classes til after New Years, which gives me like, two weeks to “take charge of the host stand” as he says. I’ve been there for two months, and no one lets me do anything because I’m new. How am I supposed to take charge when no one lets me do anything? Whatever, maybe I’ll just stay a host til the summer, and then when I move to Flagstaff, I’ll train for server then. If Craig won’t let me serve, even though that’s what I was HIRED for in the first place, its fucking stupid. I couldn’t serve at first because of my school schedule, and I completely rearranged my school for next semester so I could, and they just put me in a host position as a temporary thing, and like everyday for the past two weeks all the managers have been asking me when I was going to start training, but now Craig seems like he doesn’t want me to. I just really need to show him that even though I HATE being a host, I’m trying my best and trying to take charge the best I can being the newest one up there. So maybe he’ll see that I really want to serve, because I really do. I really enjoy it even if you get shitty customers and tips sometimes, there’s the awesome ones that really make me like working as a server. Ugh. I think I’m going to nap some more. I should probably eat some yogurt or something though. I haven’t eaten all day and the meds are making me a little sick feeling.