I believe there are too many children who need loving parents to deny one group...– Barack Obama (via no-one-fucking-cares)
My boyfriend’s cousin just had his one month old’s ears pierced. Its taking all my energy and willpower to not rip him a new asshole.
Many kids raised by Atheists are well-rounded, non-homophobic, non-ethnist,...– Paula McIntyre Whyte (via fuckyeahsexyatheists)
A summary of this morning's events.
the fuck? its definitely not THAT hard.
Giving a guy a blowjob: mouth -> penis -> pleasure
Eating out a girl: Okay take the blue wire and overlap it with the yellow wire making sure it doesn't cross the red one. After that take all three of the wires and tie them all in a knot using only your left foot.
theymaysay -> hoooold up i'm sorry, if you dont know how to eat your woman out she needs to find a more experienced partner. and btw not all guys are so simple, i.e. me. there needs to be passion behind every action. this is completely inaccurate.
87daysbefore: donotfeedthebeav replied to your post: the liquor stores close at nine around here. not a… Liquor isn’t allowed to be sold after 9PM anywhere in the US. you can tell I don’t drink much then haha. Uhhh I don’t know if you’re kidding or not, but alcohol isnt allowed to be sold after 2am and before 6am.
basically me at school all day
me: i hate all of you
me: stop screaming you saw your friend yesterday
me: holy fuck walk faster
me: get smarter idiot
me: maybe if i hit my head on my desk enough times ill die
me: stop laughing so loudly, he isn't that funny
me: shut up
me: stop flirting with every guy in the room you whore
The United States of America on college education
Student: I'm not going to go to college because I don't want to go into debt.
USA: YOU USELESS PIECE OF SHIT. YOU'RE GOING TO AMOUNT TO NOTHING YOU FUCKING SCUMBAG. YOU'RE THE REASON WHY MY TAXES ARE SO HIGH.
Student: I'm just going to attend a small community college instead.
USA: HAHAHA YOU WERE TOO STUPID TO GET INTO A GOOD UNIVERSITY. ENJOY YOUR MCDONALD'S DIPLOMA.
Student: I attended a four year university and received a diploma in a field I am interested in. Now I am $50,000+ in debt.
USA: YOU DUMBASS. WHY THE FUCK DID YOU GO TO COLLEGE WHEN YOU KNOW YOU COULDN'T AFFORD IT? YOU DIDN'T EVEN CHOOSE A USEFUL MAJOR EITHER. GOD PEOPLE LIKE YOU MAKE ME SICK.
attractive friend: wow im so ugly
me: if you're ugly, what the fuck am i then